How Do You See You?

Preparing for my first solo art show and working in and on a homeless ministry has yielded some interesting opportunities to learn more about who I am and more particularly, how I see myself versus how others view me. It’s a cathartic journey in many ways. In other ways, it’s been like peeling an onion—sometimes unpleasant and certainly guaranteed to make you cry.

Creating and selecting visual artwork to share with an audience is a lot like making a record or writing a book—both of which I know something about but haven’t found much success in doing.

Working with homeless people and working on specific areas of a ministry intended to serve them is also cathartic and revealing, every bit as much as it is a rewarding blessing to serve others. It’s a work that has stretched my understanding of what it means to love my neighbor and work in an organization as part of a team (something I’ve done most of my life).

All of this has challenged how I see myself, how I see others, and how they in turn, view me.

And, as it turns out, these perspectives aren’t always—if ever—the same.

As a Christian, my identity rests in Christ. In Him, I am a new creation. God created me, like He created you. The Bible teaches us that we are created in His image.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

2 Corinthians‬ ‭5‬:‭17‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Yet, we live in, and learn in, a fallen and broken world.

We all want to love and be loved. We want to be seen and we want to be heard. We all want to know we matter. We all want to believe that there is someone who loves us and cares for us just the way we are—our real, true self—not the one we dress up as and present to the world with our best game face on.

Like who you are really…

A newly made friend of mine named “C” shared that the first time he put on a dress is the first time he really felt like himself. Today, he often carries a purse and sometimes wears pants (out of respect for others who have trouble seeing him for who he is). He likes to think of himself as Stevie—as in Nicks. His handbag matches her style and keeps him connected to how he sees himself when pretending for how this world we live in sees him. He loves Jesus.

I am unsure of what to do with all that. It’s confusing.

The image we have of ourselves and how we see others is skewed by sin and marred by brokenness. Our realities aren’t always what we think they are—indeed, at times, what our personal reality seems to be is far different from actually reality.

THERE’S A MESSAGE
IN THE WAY A
PERSON TREATS YOU.
JUST LISTEN.

Anonymous

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iPhone Drawings: Rainer Bantau ©2024

All Rights Reserved

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As I work through and wrestle with a multitude of inputs, I can’t help but wonder about the outputs and outcomes that this journey will reveal and relinquish. I suspect I will not be the same as when I began. My perspectives will most certainly be changed, altered by the wisdom and knowledge gained by experience.

Praise God for that!

But, I’m not there yet. I’m still working on it. I hope to have a clearer view of myself —and a better understanding of others—when it’s all said and done. Maybe I will, maybe I won’t.

We’ll see.

Rainer Bantau —The Devotional Guy™