Hurt People Hurt People—But They Also Help

I’ve heard it said that hurt people hurt people. It’s a phrase that makes sense on the surface—pain often spills over, creating cycles of trauma, broken relationships, and emotional wounds that never quite heal. But if that’s all there is to it, how do we explain the people who take their pain and turn it into something good? Because I’ve also seen that hurt people help people.

And therein lies the real problem.

Many of the best caregivers, the most compassionate souls, and the people who show up in the hardest moments are those who have walked through deep pain themselves. They know what suffering feels like. They’ve lived it. And because of that, they don’t look away when someone else is struggling. Instead, they lean in. They sit in the mess with others, offering the understanding and presence they once longed for.

But here’s where things get complicated: there simply aren’t enough healthy people to care for the hurting. So we end up with wounded people tending to other wounded people. And while there’s beauty in that—empathy, shared experience, and the kind of support that only comes from someone who gets it—there’s also a cost.

If we don’t heal, if we don’t tend to our own wounds, we risk passing our unresolved pain onto those we’re trying to help. We can become so focused on pouring out for others that we don’t realize we’re running on empty. And at some point, that catches up with us.

So what do we do? We acknowledge the reality. Life hurts. Living isn’t easy. But hope exists. Healing is possible. And maybe, just maybe, we start by making space for our own healing before we try to carry someone else’s.

Because healed people help people, too.

That’s my two cents…

Thanks for reading, my friend. Until my next post…

Be salty, stay lit.

Rainer Bantau —The Devotional Guy™

#bgbg2#BibleGateway
The Stigma Stops Here.🛑
#mentalhealthmatters