It is exhausting to throw life preservers to people who don’t appreciate it when you rescue them.
Some people are natural helpers. Anytime they see someone struggling they instinctively rush in to help. They are people gifted with a good heart. However, sometimes good intentions become a heavy burden when the person doesn’t actually want to be rescued, or worse, when they resent you for trying. You see a pending problem and you proactively jump in to save everyone from a huge headache only to find out that your help not only isn’t wanted, it’s not appreciated. Draining. Demeaning. Discouraging.
In Scripture, we see that Jesus didn’t force people to change. He invited, He taught, He healed. But when the rich young ruler walked away, Jesus let him go (Mark 10:17–22).
Mark 10:17-22 NLT
As Jesus was starting out on his way to Jerusalem, a man came running up to him, knelt down, and asked, “Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” “Why do you call me good?” Jesus asked. “Only God is truly good. But to answer your question, you know the commandments: ‘You must not murder. You must not commit adultery. You must not steal. You must not testify falsely. You must not cheat anyone. Honor your father and mother.’” “Teacher,” the man replied, “I’ve obeyed all these commandments since I was young.” Looking at the man, Jesus felt genuine love for him. “There is still one thing you haven’t done,” he told him. “Go and sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” At this the man’s face fell, and he went away sad, for he had many possessions.
Love gives freely and allows others the dignity of their own choice—even when they don’t exercise wisdom or good judgment. If they’re not listening, quit talking. Save your breath.
There’s wisdom in knowing when to stop. When to stop rescuing. When to stop enabling. When to stop wearing ourselves out trying to save someone who has no intention of grabbing hold of the life preserver.
Friend, this isn’t about giving up on people. It’s about trusting God to do the saving only He can do. We can pray, we can encourage, and we can point to hope. Ultimately, each person has to decide to reach for the One who truly rescues.
Reflection Question
Where in your life do you need to stop throwing life preservers and start trusting God with the rescue?
Prayer
Lord, give me wisdom to know when to help and when to step back. Teach me to trust You with the lives of those I love, and give me peace to release what I cannot control. In the mighty name of Jesus. Amen.
Until my next post…
Wishing you a happy and fruitful #Blogtober and #Inktober!
Be salty, stay lit.
Rainer Bantau —The Devotional Guy™
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The Devotional Guy™ 
Thank you, Nicola 🙏
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Wise words indeed.
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Thank you, David. It was a difficult post to write because the last thing I want to do is unintentionally discourage people from helping others. However, sometimes it’s frustrating to see someone care more than the person they are helping. The toll it takes on them is unreal (and I believe unsustainable).
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This is excellent, brother! I’m a “card carrying “ helper who is prone to rush in to save the day. Like you said, some folks don’t want help—even if they really need it.
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