The Desperate Lunatic Rants of a Powerless Control Freak

Recently, I had an experience where nothing was going according to my script. I could feel my blood pressure rising, my heart constricting, and the blood pushing through my veins. My head nearly exploded. You know the feeling?

Fortunately, I recognized what was happening and resisted the temptation to start the War to End All Wars with my tongue. The tongue is a magnificent tool. It can be used to lavish great encouragement. The tongue can devastate the spirit of our neighbors and our fellow believers.

⁹ With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. ¹⁰ Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. ¹¹ Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? ¹² My brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water. James 3:9-12 (NIV)

It’s common for me, as a recovering addict, to go bonsai bananas crazy when people don’t follow the script I failed to give them. It’s an urge I have to fight almost daily. This conundrum reminds me that I don’t control everything. Truthfully, aside from myself, I don’t control much of anything.

My wife and I love animals. I’ve grown up with all kinds of four-legged, furry friends. Dogs, cats, rabbits, chickens, a Canadian Goose, and even horses. Sweet T and I currently provide home to five (yes, five) cats. One of them, a dilute torti, we’ve had since she weighed less than a pound and fit in the palm of my hand. The other four came along a couple of years ago when a neighborhood stray cat had kittens on our patio. At the time we had two cats and a dog.

If you ever need to be reminded of how little you control, get a cat. They’re great at letting you know that they follow a script all their own. They do things on their terms. Not yours.

There are things I control and things I don’t. Each day, I pray the Lord grants me the wisdom to know the difference.

Successfully navigating the treacherous waters of the day is grounded in my faith. God is God. I am not. Recognizing that things happen that I can’t explain, understand, or possibly grasp is a good start to getting comfortable with the knowledge that most days I can only control myself and maintain little control over anything else.

But then Scripture doesn’t say much about me being in charge. It declares that I am to submit myself to God Almighty and that I am to love Him with my everythingness. In addition to that, my job is to love everyone else. Everyone. Even the people I don’t like.

The only control the Bible really mentions that I need to practice is self-control. That doesn’t require much of a script. Just keep it simple stupid. Don’t over think it. Keep your eyes focused on God and it’ll be alright.