Wednesday Wisdom | Self Portrait #6–7

There is a version of us that lives between numbers. We aren’t who we were. Yet,we aren’t who we will be. We are somewhere in between: unfinished, unresolved, and sometimes unnamed. We are a work in progress.

My “Self Portrait #6–7” lives in that space. Spawned as part of a class assignment meant to challenge and stretch us by our drawing instructor Jay W, it involved creating a visual metaphor that wasn’t trite or cliche. It required me (and my classmates) to dig deep and not settle for the easy answer.

“Self Portrait #6-7”
© 2026 Rainer Bantau All Rights Reserved

Much of life is lived in the tension between who we were and who we will be.

“Self Portrait #6-7” is a visual rendering of this balance. Since being diagnosed with complex bereavement and post-traumatic stress disorder, I’ve learned a new way of seeing and working with my hands, while my mind sometimes still hangs on by a thread.

In my healing and recovery journey, I sought resolution. However, God provided me process. I wanted clarity. God continued forming me in the foggy blur surrounding my heart, mind, and soul. While I’m ready to be done and move on to the next chapter, God meets me where I am and holds me fast.

Friend, sometimes I am swimming. Other days, I’m simply treading water. And on a few occasions, I’ve felt like I was drowning.

There is a wisdom in not rushing past your “6” to get to your “7” because the work happening in the tension is sacred. It’s where our strength is renewed and refined and where our vision is reshaped.

but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:31 ESV

For me personally, it means learning a new way of seeing and discovering joy in working with my hands. In between the tension is where my relationship with the Lord deepens. When I create, I am closer to God than I’ve ever been.

Friend, I invite you to let people see you without a preface as you embrace the parts of your story that don’t yet make sense. Trust that God remains at work. He’s not done with you yet.

Woe to him who strives with him who formed him, a pot among earthen pots! Does the clay say to him who forms it, “What are you making?” or “Your work has no handles?”

Isaiah‬ ‭45‬:‭9‬ ‭ESV‬‬

You are not behind. You are not incomplete, at least not in the way you might think.

You are simply in the in-between.

There is wisdom in recognizing that. Embrace it.

Remember: God is the potter. We are the clay. Trust that the Lord is at work in you and all around you.